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You Want Me To Do What? My First Day of Exodus 90: A Journey Toward Freedom and Brotherhood

Today marked my first step into Exodus 90, a spiritual journey that I had heard about for years from a work buddy but had never dared to undertake. For those unfamiliar, Exodus 90 is a 90-day Catholic Spiritual Exercise for Men focused on prayer, asceticism, and fraternity. As a product of Catholic Schools through 18th grade, and a long-time member of Cure of Ars Catholic Church, I thought I had a pretty good handle on my faith. But I realized I’d grown too comfortable—too distracted by life’s conveniences and too distant from the discipline that deepens one’s relationship with Christ. 

As mentioned above, I thought I had things figured out, but when I truly sat down and thought about it, things weren’t as good as they seemed.  Most men are burdened with endless distractions, loneliness and self-doubt.  This program provided a roadmap for overcoming these chronic problems many men have.  

If I had to rate myself on a scale of 1-10:

  • Prayer Life:  6 out of 10
  • Distractions By Stuff: 5 out of 10
  • Fraternity and Friendship:  1 out of 10

Prayer

The heart of Exodus 90 is prayer. Every participant commits to a daily holy hour. Through the Exodus 90 app, we are guided each day with a chapter from the Book of Exodus—a fitting reminder of our journey out of the modern-day “Egyptian strongholds” in our lives. Like the Israelites, we don’t always know how long the journey will take, and for some of us (myself included), the transformation may take longer than 90 days. But the hope is that, with God’s grace, we reach our own Promised Land sooner rather than later.

Asceticism

When I first heard the word “asceticism,” I had no idea what it meant or what it entailed. For Exodus 90, it’s all about saying no to certain comforts and distractions and saying yes to something greater. The program encourages participants to abstain from a specific list of worldly indulgences: cold showers instead of hot, no alcohol, no sweets, no soda, no TV or televised sports (are you kidding me, it’s Chiefs Playoff time), no video games (yeah I still play Fortnite with the boys), no non-essential purchases, and limited use of computers and mobile devices. Additionally, we fast from meat on Wednesdays and Fridays. On top of that, regular, intense exercise three days a week is required. I mean who are these people taking away all of life’s great vices?  It’s a challenging list….but when all is said it done, it comes down to reducing your reliance from the things that often control us.

Fraternity

Let’s face it—most men struggle to maintain deep friendships. Many of us live in isolation, convincing ourselves we can thrive on our own. Society often glorifies men who achieve great things solo, but the truth is, if you want to accomplish more, you need a team. Luckily I joined a men's group at Cure of Ars a few years ago and this program is built on the foundation of fraternity, and connecting with men of faith in your community. There are 12 of us participating from my men’s group – along with many hundreds of thousands from around the world.  Each participant is paired with an “anchor,” someone to guide you through the program and hold you accountable with daily check-ins (Sean doesn’t know what he is in for).   Beyond that, you meet weekly with a larger group for prayer, fellowship, and discussion about the week’s challenges. It’s a powerful reminder that we’re not meant to do this alone.

So How’s Day 1 Going?

Well….could this program have started on any worse of a day?  Wife is out of town, all three boys are off school, it is the Presidential Inauguration and the College Football National Championship Game is TONIGHT.  Notre Dame vs Ohio State.  But I digress.  The day started early. Really early. I got up before dawn, the house quiet except for the faint hum of the furnace working overtime in this January -6 degrees chill. I just sat and listened.  I embraced the silence, taking 20 intentional minutes to reflect. The Gospel reading spoke to me in a way it hadn’t before, almost as if God was saying, “This is where I’ve wanted you all along—listening, present, unhurried.”  I closed out the morning at mass with a few of my fellow Exodus 90 brothers.

From there, I began to grapple with the program’s disciplines. Asceticism is no joke. No snacks between meals, no sweets, no TV, no social media and no booze for 90 days? For a guy who loves his IPAs, and is part of a men's group called Whiskey Wednesdays, this felt like a death sentence. Yet, as I brewed my black coffee—no cream, no sugar—it hit me: these sacrifices aren’t about deprivation. They’re about detachment. Each small “no” trains my heart to say “yes” to something greater.

The toughest part, though, was giving up screens. No mindless scrolling through Instagram. No binge-watching my favorite shows. But something else weird happened.  No distractions led to more in-depth conversations with my three boys Colin, Brendan and Evan. Who would’ve thought something as simple as unplugging could open the door to a deeper connection?

As I reflect on this first day, we’re all battling distractions, temptations, and the constant pull of comfort. But we’re also here for the same reason: to become better husbands, fathers, and men of God.

Today wasn’t easy, but it was worth it.  Only 89 more days to go.


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